When you first spoke the words ‘Till death us do part,’ you probably did really mean them. However, things can change over time, and the thought of spending the rest of your life in an unhappy relationship will end up impacting upon you in a very negative way.
It may be sad to admit, but sometimes it is best just to cut your losses and break up.
That being said, when there are signs your relationship is in trouble, it is always possible to work through your problems and restore the intimacy and bond that you once had between you.
Here is how to tell when your relationship is in trouble and what you can do about it.
1. You’re Not Happy Anymore
The relationship that you choose to be in should make you feel happy. However, if you are left feeling unhappy, angry, frustrated, or distressed, then it might be the right time to consider whether the relationship that you are in is the right one for you.
There may be one or more things that are causing you to be unhappy in your relationship. Often, the actual things that are causing you unhappiness can be quite small; however, they can be built up over time to seem more significant than they are.
Identify whatever is causing you happiness and address these issues through a course of couple’s therapy. If therapy does not help, then you may consider breaking up with each other.
2. You Avoid Each Other at All Costs
Sometimes in a relationship, there may be times when one or both of you would rather be alone than to spend time together. If you find yourself making excuses for not spending time together, then you should ask yourself why this is.
There is clearly something that has not been addressed within your relationship. Address the situation by asking yourself why you are avoiding spending time together.
Is it because you find that you argue often? Is there something that you are avoiding talking about?
Often, the underlying reason for avoiding each other can be something that can be addressed. Try to communicate to work things through. If you are unable to do this on your own, a therapist may be able to help you.
3. You Avoid Your Partner’s Touch
Do you recoil when your partner touches you? Do you avoid intimacy?
If you don’t want to be physically intimate with your partner, then this could cause problems between you. There is usually an excellent reason for this, and avoiding intimacy usually signifies a deeper issue that will need to be addressed.
While a lack of intimacy on the part of one of you could be signs that your relationship is in trouble, it is essential that you address this by talking about your problems instead of avoiding them.
If you are unable to address this by talking about it, a psychosexual therapist may help you regain intimacy by giving you some physical exercises to work through together.
4. Other People Tell You That You Should Break Up
If you are in a relationship that is in trouble, you may not see it yet yourself. Even if you can’t see it, it doesn’t mean that other people won’t.
If other people are telling you that you should break up, then there may be some truth in what they are saying.
Talk to friends and family that may have spotted these issues and find out what they think is wrong with your relationship. Their insight may be quite valuable.
5. You Would Rather Be Alone
Do you spend a lot of your time imagining what your life would be like if you were single? Do you think about the future and not see your partner in it?
If you would rather be alone than to be in the relationship that you are in, then it is clear that as a couple you a destined for failure.
While you can try and work through your issues together, if your heart is not in it, then you should do the right thing and end the relationship.
While in practice your relationship may be too complicated just to throw away, it is essential that you try and address these feelings rather than letting them grow.
6. Your Interactions Are Mostly Negative
Do you spend most of your time together arguing? If you spend more time arguing and insulting each other, then you will be living with a great deal of stress and tension in your life. This is not good for either of you.
In this instance, you may want to weigh up legal separation vs divorce.
7. One of You Has Cheated
If one of you has cheated within your relationship and you are not the type of person who cheats, ask yourself why this has happened?
If there has been a string of infidelities, then you should address this issue with the support of a therapist if you wish to stay together.
For many people, cheating is a hard line and will spell the end of a relationship. It is up to you as a couple to decide how you wish to progress following infidelity.
Don’t Ignore the Signs Your Relationship is in Trouble
These seven examples are all clear signs your relationship is in trouble. You may tick several of these boxes. If you do, then you need to address these issues sooner rather than later.
In many cases, a relationship can be saved if both partners act together to try to work on it. Speak to each other and find out how much you both want to be with one another before deciding to call it a day.
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